Fakes

Some people can spot a Louis Vuitton fake. Or Prada. Or....well, honestly, that's all I can think of. Wait! How about Burberry?

That's not my world, so I wouldn't know one from the other. And I don't really care about fake or real designer brands.

My world is Paul Frank or Lonsdale -- stuff like that.

Paul Frank lovers belong to this secret cult. We're not afraid to compliment one another or to openly stare and admire another's Paul Frank items. Lonsdale people do this less. The most that's ever happened to me is girls staring at my lovely Lonsdale purse. It's mostly a UK thing unless you're a boxer.

I'm not going to say I can spot a fake Paul Frank or a fake Lonsdale item right off the bat, but as someone who has bought a fake Lonsdale purse on eBay and received a fake Paul Frank wallet from a friend, I'm now a bit more educated. I don't use my fake Lonsdale purse anymore because I bought a real one and now I feel weird about it. I don't care about my Paul Frank wallet. It's hard to tell it's fake.

Today I had to go to the post office on Sutter. A block away is the Paul Frank store, so I thought I'd go in after the Post Office and see if they had any new shirts for my hubby. That's pretty much all we can afford from Paul Frank. Everything else is priced way to high for just a splurge buy.

When I started walking to the Paul Frank store, I realized that if I bought anything, I would have to pull out my fake Paul Frank wallet. Should I hide it? Just whip it out and stand my ground? At least I knew it was fake. I had that going for me.

I went in, looked around, admired a 90 dollar bag (come on -- designer bags a 10 times that! I think?) and decided on a lovely Paul Frank Julius Devil t-shirt for my hubby. I wanted to get him this shirt for a long time, might as well do it now.

Before I bought the shirt, I admired the real Paul Frank wallets. I even went so far as to ask the cashier how much they all were. Not that expensive, but too much for me today. I think I asked as a precursor of him maybe pointing out that my wallet was fake. Like, yeah, I know it is, and I could just as easily buy a real one, but I'm not. So there. Take that, Paul Frank store cashier!

I put the shirt down and announced I was only buying the shirt today.

The cashier told me my total before I had a chance to take out my fake wallet, and so I hesitated a bit. I was going to try to take my credit card out without him seeing my wallet. But he was tall, so I figured he was going to see it no matter what. I may as well be honest about it instead of looking dorky because I was obviously trying to hide my wallet.

Then it happened.

"Is that a fake Paul Frank wallet?" he asked me.

I proudly said, "Yes, it is." I was caught.

"They did a good job. It's one of the better ones I've seen," he told me.

"Oh, my friend went to Hong Kong and brought this back for me. I was fooled at first, but then I figured out no e-tailers were selling this wallet, and the people who were on eBay were all from Hong Kong. And there's no tag."

"It's a good monkey. They did a good job," he said.

"You're the first person to notice, actually," I told him. Then I thought how stupid I was for saying that. Of course he knows it's fake. He works at a Paul Frank store. He probably has to watch some film about fakes and how to spot them when he got hired.

He said, "Really?" Like it was that hard to believe. I'm yet again a dork.

So I paid, and I dorkily said as I was leaving, "Someday I will buy a real wallet. When I have the money." Yet, I just bought a t-shirt that was more than any of the wallets on display.

When I got closer to work, I called my hubby and said, "There's nothing worse than going to the Paul Frank store and buying something and pulling out your fake Paul Frank wallet."

He just laughed at me. A little too much, in my opinion.

In case you're wondering what a fake Paul Frank wallet looks like so you can spot it quickly next time you're out and about, here it is and only on eBay: Fake Paul Frank Wallet.