Fan

I got to do something I never thought I would do for any reason, at any time, anywhere. And just because I happened to be walking down Market Street at about 4:45pm on Wednesday evening in January, the 11th of 2006 to be exact. Oh, and I was with my husband. He's important in this story because I would have never done it otherwise.

We were heading toward the Four Seasons hotel, and there were crowds of people and a giant bus -- I can't remember what they're called, but the ones with the big, cushy seats and lots of room and really tall and are my nightmare because I feel like the bus will tip over since it's so tall and big -- and men bringing luggage to another truck because the bus was full. I thought it was some weird travel thing for tourists, and if that was the case, it was weird that they were staying at that Four Seasons since the rooms are so darn expensive.

We walked through the first line of people (yes, that's right, they were lined up), through the empty space in front of the doors to the hotel, and then stopped where the second group of people were standing. During this time, my husband realized all these people were waiting for something. Not the bus to leave, mind you, but a celebrity. Perhaps several celebrities. Oooo...if I only had a camera phone!!

I love celebrity sightings like anyone else, and I freely admit that I read the gossip columns and buy People and US on occasion. Why do I care? I don't know. It's fun, brainless, mindless, no-thought reading. I've grown up. I can admit these things. I don't need to stay in the closet all my life.

So we stood there, and then my husband (being the brilliant one out of us two because I would have been long gone if I was alone) realized it was for a sports team. His wheels started working, and he realized it was for a basketball sports team (his favorite sport). That's when I lost interest because basketball players are not celebrities in my book. His suspicions were confirmed when we spotted all the sports paraphernalia people had with them, including a half-deflated basketball. Some guy asked us who everyone was waiting for, and my husband told him, "We don't know, we're waiting to see ourselves."

Oh, the herd mentality. It only takes one person to start something like this.

That was when two of the tallest, lankiest, most odd-looking men I've ever seen walked out the hotel door and headed to the bus. My husband got a bit excited, said, "Oh! I know him! I can't remember his name, though!"

They both stopped and signed autographs while a big, muscley man stood behind them.

"Is he their 'muscle'," I asked.

"He's probably from the hotel, but yeah," my husband responded.

"So if I bum-rushed the players right now, he would knock me over?"

"Probably."

We stood for a minute or so more and then left.

When we got home, my husband looked up who was playing the Warriors tonight. It was the Miami Heat. Which made our basketball player spotting so much the better because Miami Heat has Shaque on the team! And some other guy that my husband says is really good too, but I don't remember his name. Too bad we didn't stick around because Shaque is the closest thing to a celebrity I'll ever see.

Except that two times I took pictures with Penn from Penn and Teller.

I really need to get a camera phone.