Remember the whole "I didn't get any sleep because I kept thinking about cake" incident? That is the type of thing I obsess about these days. No, no, I don't waste my time worrying about the lack of rain, wars, people dying, our country falling apart because of greedy people, whether I'll have a job tomorrow or not, etc. I worry about stupid things like cakes. And now this crazy cat woman at our condo complex.
Maybe I should have gotten up during one of the 50 times I woke up last night thinking about this whole thing and written this post then and not now, when I'm dead tired and can barely keep my eyes open and am hoping for a nice little nap tomorrow or Sunday, but definitely preferably tomorrow, but that's probably not going to happen because Mateo is having a play date with his cousins and will most likely pass out in the car on the way home, and if he does that, that means he will only power nap tomorrow because he is so not the type of kid that can be taken out of a car, carried inside, have his shoes and jacket taken off, and then put down for a nap in his crib, OH NO - he's the super power nap type of kid when it comes to falling asleep in a car, and will not, under any circumstances, remain asleep once we get home. Oh, and I forgot to mention that I usually nap when he naps. So that's why that is all a problem.
Our condo complex is home for many feral cats. At some point, most of the cats were captured, fixed and then released back to the complex. I think we're all so used to the cats that instead of trying to domesticate them or put them down, the powers that be (at the condo complex, that is) decided it was better to just stop the new babies from happening instead getting rid of the cats altogether.
I, being an animal lover and partial to the cat, thought that that was a great idea. I even helped out by taking in one of the feral kittens and giving her a nice home where she continually drives us nuts with her constant cat chatter and curiosity, but she's the nicest, sweetest cat we've taken in in a long time. It seemed we lost a lot of cats after the "fixing" began, but now, now there are a whole mess of them, some in really bad shape, some looking ready to be loved up because they are so fluffy and pretty, and some looking just like Zoe, the feral kitten we took in (her brethren run the condo parking lot), with their shiny black fur, black noses and white spot on their chests.
And now enters the crazy cat lady. She has VW Bug parked in our section of the condo parking lot (our complex is big - takes up two or three blocks) that just sits there and is never used as an actual vehicle. Instead, it houses a really big bag of cat food -- like the 40 lb size of cat food.
What she used to do, during warm weather, was drive her other car to the VW Bug, park wherever (usually blocking other parking spots or the drive thru areas), get out, unlock the door to the Bug, scoop cat food, and proceed to dump piles of cat food around the parking lot where her car is sitting. While this is annoying because all the cat food she leaves out attracts other critters besides cats, such as raccoons, opossums, skunks and various garbage eating birds (and probably some rats and mice), I thought, well, it's really not affecting me, so what do I care. You know, the normal American passivity we all harbor these days!
Then the weather changed, and sometimes it rained, and the crazy cat lady decided she needed to move her food dumping spots. And, of course, more likely than not, that meant there would be three piles of dry cat food on the white line of our parking spot in the carport. Make that three piles on the two white lines that designate our parking spot. The parking spot we technically own since we bought our condo even though we don't really have a deed to the actual parking spots per se, but that's what the HOA people say when you call and complain about anything parking related.
And because our car is a smallish SUV-type car, and I have to get stuff out of the front, the passenger seat (that would be Mateo) and the back part almost every time I park the car, and since I really find it annoying that this crazy cat lady is doing this, I often kick the cat food on purpose and sometimes not, so that cat food ends up flying everywhere, and then, for good measure, I walked all over the cat food nuggets so they get crushed and aren't really food anymore. I mean, really, people, how stupid can you be to pour cat food where people actually need to walk?
I almost lost it last week when it was pouring rain and I was going to take Mateo to daycare. I was sitting in the car, messing with my iPod when I noticed a sedan-type car pull up behind our car, blocking my way out. Since I was still messing with my iPod, I just waited before I tried to back out and bash into the car (kidding...sorta). The car moved up a bit more and parked. I pulled out and realized it was the crazy cat lady. She had parked her other car, the one that is actually used as a means of transportation, was scooping cat food out of a bag in her trunk, and putting the cat food in someone else's carport parking spot. I have to assume she was going to target our parking spot again, but realized I was sitting in the car, so she moved on.
I stopped our car and had a split second where I was ready to jump out of the car and start yelling at her. I tend to have a short fuse at times, especially with random things that I should just turn the other cheek to. I really think I experience anger and happiness on different levels than most, but that's another story. Then I told myself to just pull back into the parking spot and wait for her to leave so at least this one day I could go without cat food all about our parking spot. Plus, I had Mateo in the car, and really, I do so hate seeing adults going ballistic when kids are around. So unnecessary.
I told myself to call the HOA office and ask what can be done about this crazy cat woman and her cat food piles, but, as with most things that don't require immediate attention, I forgot all about it. And since that one day, we've had cat food in our parking spot, but nothing like before, so it still didn't cause me to act.
Yesterday I arrived home to find crushed cat food scattered about our parking spot, which I thought was kinda interesting, but figured it was leftover from some other time the crazy cat lady dumped food in our parking spot. Mateo and I had a nice chat with the neighbor across the hall from us (who is in absolute love with Mateo, something that freaks him out immensely and he refuses to say anything to her) and then we headed to the gate to get inside the complex.
When I get inside our condo, I always check the phone, turn on the living room light, and check the temperature on the thermostat. So I did the later two things first and then looked at the phone. We had a message.
"Hello, this is so and so from the HOA office, and someone reported that you're feeding cats in your carport. We need to talk to you about this as it's causing all kinds of animals to come into the parking lot to eat the catfood...."
My blood began to boil (that quick temper thing I mentioned). I stopped listening to her babble on about resolutions and cats and food and was waiting for her to give me the number to the HOA office so I could call back and leave a message.
In hindsight, I probably should just have waited, because even though I don't quite remember everything I said, I know I was talking for a long time and stating how angry I am about this and it is not me who is doing it and I know who is and I have a young child, so why would I want to come home to find a raccoon in my parking spot and so on and so forth and yeah. As I did with their message, they probably were just waiting for me to give them some alternate phone number to call so they could get a hold of me.
I immediately called my husband, who was on the train coming home, and started my ranting and raving, and when he had to get off the phone, I immediately called my mom and ranted and raved to her instead (thanks, Mom!). Oh yeah, and I remembered that Mateo was still strapped into his stroller and waiting to be released so he could begin his slow destruction of our condo.
Then I devised the most brilliant plan - EVER! I was going to take pictures of her Bug! So I told Mateo we were going outside to get the mail, and since that boy loves any and all chances to go outside, he grabbed his jacket and hat in eager anticipation, and we headed outside...with my camera.
And yes, I took pictures, and yes, that does seem a little silly today; but yesterday, yesterday it made complete and utter sense!. Since I probably won't be using any of my spy photos for reasons that will become clear later on, I'll use one here.
I also took close-ups of the cat food bag, but I'll spare any readers who are still actually reading this post.
My husband came home, Mateo and I met him outside, I took more pictures, we went inside, did our normal night routine, and about 2 hours later I noticed the answering machine light was on. Turns out that while I was outside taking my super slick spy pictures, the HOA people called me back. After 6pm, mind you, a time no one is usually in the office.
That just about pushed me over the edge. I could have talked to them today! I could have plead my case of not being the cat feeder! I WAS NOT THE CRAZY CAT LADY!
This stuck in my mind and burrowed in so deeply that I woke up all night long and stewed about the whole thing. Very similarly to the cake crazy brain night. I thought about them calling me, not believing me, me showing them the pictures, them saying so what.... Me jumping out of the bushes and tackling the crazy cat lady.... Just about anything and everything.
Really, if there is one thing I do not like, it's being blamed for something I did not do. Especially if I could be fined for breaking some sort of rule.
So I obsessed and didn't get any sleep. And I'm pretty darn tired today.
When I got to work, I kept thinking, they're going to call me today....they're going to call me today.... I have to make sure I tell them everything again....calling me....cat food....
Then I decided to tell my boss about the whole thing and she declared me nuts and I agreed.
Really, the more people I tell this story to, the more I realize how nutty I am (hence the name of the blog, yes, there is a real reason for it).
The phone rang.
I answered it.
The lady said she was from the HOA office and she wanted to know if I knew the crazy cat lady's parking spot number.
I told her.
She said she'd take the issue up with number blahblahblah then (we're all numbers to these HOA people when it comes down to it).
I said okay.
She said bye.
And this is why I probably will not be using my spy pictures.
And, as with the whole cake obsession, it all ended very anti-climatically.
This is my life.